A Denver Odyssey

The Challenge of the Charger

We rejoin our heroes as they are packing up the last of Tim's things and looking around for anything he might have been forgetting in his new apartment. Tim glanced at his cell phone and noticed the battery was low, reminding him to pack his charger. He leaned over, grabbed the adapter that was plugged into the wall, and pulled it out of the socket. Derek commented on the astonished look on Tim's face as he stared at the premature end of the charger cord. A quick glance at the ground where the cord had been resting showed the cause of Tim's scornful look. Much to his dismay, sometime during the previous night, Acorn, Mackenzie's (Tim's new roommate's) dog, had taken the liberty of shredding the power adapter into a thousand tiny pieces. Tim was speechless as to what to do for a moment. In the end, Tim shook his finger at the dog (since he was unsure of proper punishment typically meted out by its rightful owner) and purchased a generic charger at Best Buy.

False Start

At 1:40 p.m. (EDT), the travellers were merging onto I-70 Westbound on the east side of Columbus. They assumed they were finally on their way, but much to their surprise, they still had some business in Columbus to take care of. Tim remembered at the last second that he was to send out a book that an eBayer had purchased from him a few days prior. Derek convinced him to patronize the post office north of the Ohio State campus, since the both of them knew exactly where that was. Tim obliged and after waiting a few minutes in line, the package was sent, change of address forms were filled out for Tim and Derek, and the two were on their way.

The First Leg

Tim took the helm during the first leg of the journey, the initial destination being Indianapolis, IN. He ended up eating nearly an entire bag of sunflower seeds too keep him lively and occupied. The car was filled to its ceiling with Derek's clothing and personal effects. Many, many travellers passed the sluggish Nissan Stanza our heroes were navigating and stared in amazement at the packing job Derek had done. Unfortunately for Tim, Derek had neglected to leave a space for his bag and was forced to leave something behind so Tim could include his vacation clothing on the trip. Despite this setback, the packing job by Derek was impressive. Even though the passenger had to travel with a suitcase on his lap for part of the voyage, the tension provided by the mass of clothing/junk ended up freeing the passenger of this hinderance. The suitcase, it was found, was able to be wedged in just the right spot that it could balance there and not get in the way of the driver, nor the passenger. A break was taken at Indianapolis long enough for dinner to be purchased at Burger King. The two were on their way sooner than could be imagined and Derek took over the driving, creating the second leg of our journey.

Mississippi Bound

The duo continued from Indianapolis in a cloud of Burger King odor. The next destination was St. Louis, MO. Approximately halfway to this fine city, Derek realized that the Chariot Stanza would be needing fuel and his bladder would be needing an emptying. The pair found a Pilot truckstop and proceded to its air pump, as the automobile's tires were looking a bit low. Once Derek the Younger found out that the pump was broken, he moseyed into the convenience store to request a refund. Tim the Elder followed in suit and found some items for purchasing including water, treats, and a road atlas that proved to be unbelievably helpful. Tim had this to say about the first gasoline stop:

"8:43 p.m. (EDT) Pilot Stop: The engaged hot chick is sure making some guy happy. The driving has been smoothe sailing so far. I pulled the first leg of driving from Columbus to Indianapolis and Derek is taking Indy to St. Louis. The BBQ place might be out of the picture, but I am sure it will be there for the next trip."

With 341 miles, 10 pictures, and $22.50 in gas gone, the Costanza barrelled on towards St. Louis with Derek at the helm.

High Rolling , High Living By a High Arch

Tim fell asleep shortly after leaving the lovely lady at the Pilot truckstop. Derek woke him up during their last few seconds in Illinois and as the duo crossed the Martin Luther King Jr. Bridge connecting Illinois with Missouri, Tim gazed up at the magnificent arch for the second time in his life, Derek his first. This was a monumental occassion at a monumental monument. Pictures had to be taken and memories recorded. Just before turning down the long, slow straightaway parallel to the St. Louis Arch, something bright caught the eyes of the young travellers: a casino boat! Tim was skeptical at first, wanting to keep good time and stay on schedule. Derek quickly reminded him to "Fuck it!" He added that there was no schedule and that they were on a vacation/roadtrip. These facts solidified Derek's argument and Tim quickly reiterated Derek's sentiment. "Fuck it!" The two entered the casino, an experience Derek remembered in the Captain's Log...

"11:15 p.m. (EDT) President's Casino: We are waiting to get out of the parking lot at a riverboat casino in St. Louis that I'm sure has bever left its dock. The St. Lunatics are ablaze. Tiiim and I each lost $10 in consecutive blackjack hands. I to a mullet-man, he to a non-descript short haired woman. The place was pretty discombobulating and I felt a little like Hunter [S. Thompson]. Tiiim thinks they are cheating. A little girl was left in the car outside the casino [while her mother was in playing the slots]."

Since the casino held little for the two as far as riches go, they decided that their riches would be held in memories and photos of themselves with the arch and riverboats. To take such a picture, Tim navigated the [Co]Stanza to a service road that was wedged between the Arch and the Mississippi River. The Old Miss. The Old Man. Dee-ee-eep River.... The two sheepishly parked the car and exited it, strange people lurking about. They had some trouble taking their first couple pictures, but they quickly got some nice clear shots to remember the occassion by. Getting the car out of the service road proved to be a challenge to Tim and Derek ended up paying the parking attendant $5 so they could leave through the proper gate. Derek had this to say about the occasion:

"11:37 p.m. (EDT) St. Louis Arch: While trying to procure a picture with the arch, Tiiim and I encountered a floating ghetto and many a shady-looking thing happening in and betwixt parked cars. We had to pay $5 to get out because Tiiim can't twerk the clutch."

Tim spent the last hour or so of Day One driving through the Missouri night. The BBQ place the two had been craving was merely a dream at 11:00 p.m. (EDT) With nothing but darkness and an open road ahead of them, Derek quickly fell asleep, succumbing to his need for ten hours of sleep each Day, and Tim steadily drove off into the night.